In my experience, fear can either be an enemy or an ally. The trick is learning to control this emotion and channel it into determination. This works with both rational fears, such as the fear of loss, and irrational fears, such as the fear of causing pain. Whether irrational or rational, these thoughts can be paralyzing, if not balanced with an equal amount of cautious optimism.
People with physical challenges, such as myself, live with the constant threat of injury/ pain. For example, when I was younger, I was afraid to do most physical activities, because I could always see the worst possible scenario. Over time, I learned ways of minimizing potential damage. I always look at the floor when I walk, especially when going down stairs. This reminds me to focus on my balance. In the past, I have unintentionally broken shunts because of seemingly minor head injuries. I have learned to crane my neck upwards, so as the avoid any such impact. Despite the fact that accidents are unavoidable, they teach me to stay aware of my surroundings. Emotional pain is harder to avoid.
I’m extremely cautious about building relationships , outside of my family. As previously mentioned, I lost my father when I was very young. After the years I have lost of close relationships, such as both my grandmother, as well as high school friends. For a time, I tended to form emotional attachments too quickly, because I viewed life as being too short. This, coupled to my stubborn resolution to hold on to difficult bonds, resulted in emotional wounds and trust issues. Over the years, I have learned to take my time in forming emotional bonds. Through constant Scriptural reading and prayer, I have learned to only accept relationships when the other person is willing to accept me as I am. Loneliness is no excuse for holding on to a bad relationship. My painful personal journey has taught more about having self respect and that genuine bonds are never difficult.
Fear is a part of life, but that doesn’t mean that it needs to rule your life. Growth comes when people learn how to cope with, and even turn the table, on their fears. Life is worth living, despite its difficulties. If handled properly, pain and loss are stepping stones to reaching the full potential that God created us for. May the LORD bless all of my readers.